Went to meet Erica yesterday and only then did i realized how soon I will be flying off. She told me that she dreads going back and just the thought of it makes her sink into depression. Yes, she enjoys sing. Just like how much I used to look forward to returning to sing n spending my hols in sing. But now, I find things meaningless. There's nothing for me to look forward to. I'm suppose to spend 5 wks of this hols in Sing but I went for a camp n track for 1 wk, grounded for another den to BKK for 1. Altogether, i was active for only 2 weeks. No wonder I'd not eaten lots of things this time round nor do much. Had only swim 3 times so far. Sometimes I dun want to go back yet sometimes I cant wait to go back so that I can get it over and done with. Its all so contradicting.
I do not want such a long break. That's why I choose to go back to melb to do summer. Even though I wont finish my course early, I don't mind. As long as I have something to do other than to work. Time pass rather quickly when studying. Hence I hope tt once school starts, time will flies. Such that before I know it, I will be sitting for my last exams.
Yes, one more year is all it takes. Sometime really feels like screaming to everyone 'One more year! Just wait for me for one more year!' One more year and I will be able to re-renovate my room, gets a dog, start working and return my parents what I had own them. One more year is the amount of time that I want you to wait for me. But will it be too late? Will it be too late for me to do any of these things in one year time?
Time waits for no man. I believe ppl my age shld realized that. How we had aged.. The stress and responsibilities that is piling up. Yet sometimes we still behave like sweet seventeen. Dancing around the pillars, making lots of noise during BBQ, acting like a kid and whining and teasing.. Yes. That's how sometimes we choose to behave. Spilt personalities symptoms? Are we trying to go back to the past to avoid the stress n problems we are facing now? Or is it just another way of reliving stress. Its tiring acting like a kid all day. On the other hand, its equally tiring to be behaving in a all grown up n mature way. But due to certain circumstances, one has no choice but to do what is expected from them. The man behind the mask...
Went to check out my summer timetable just now and realized that I have 4 days of school per wk. 2 days for tut n 2 days for lect. 3 hrs of lect each time and 1.5hrs of tut per day. 4 wks of studying den another few days for exams. What about the break after that? Great barrier reef? Gold coast? Brisbane? Any interested parties? My mum told me that she will not be coming during my Feb break. I guess she was disappointed with my behavior in BKK. She told me she wants to get another stall. I do not approve of her idea. But she's insisting. I do not know what else to say. Just pray that in this one yr, she will not fall sick nor hospitalized. Wait for me. Just for one more year.
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